The conversation then moved onto the Greek/Euro/Global economic crisis. I’m not going to bore you with a detailed description of how the crisis occurred. But I will say that solutions to the crisis were proposed by us – solutions that would work, solutions that could be implemented, solutions that nobody else had thought of, solutions that would and could save the world. Solutions that could win us a Noble prize.
Well, the economics Nobel prize, and since economics is ostensibly about people – the Peace prize as well. That’s hitting two birds with one stone.
Not bad for a few minutes work over a glass of wine. It’s amazing what you can achieve if you bang a few coconuts – sorry heads – together.
So, having saved the world from falling off the precipice of certain economic disaster, we then decided to treat ourselves, and talk about women.
Not a woman, but all womankind.
We talked about how much we love women. Well, actually, I generally talked about how much I love women. The others were talking about how much they couldn’t stand them. But me. I love you all women! How could I not? I am a man am I not? With a hairy chest and deep booming voice and bristling rippling muscles oozing out of my shirt. Nor am I homophobic, so if you happen to be a man that likes other men, then you are also still a man. Just thought I’d mention that in case some of my readers are gays, or lesbians, or bisexual, or trisexual or something else not covered in the Oxford English Dictionary – or dirty web sites.
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, I was talking about how much I love women. Women are nice. They look nice. They smell nice. They taste nice, and if you ask nicely, they do nice things to you too. No not the washing! Other stuff. Can’t talk about it here. This is a PG rated site and it is not yet pass the 9pm watershed. Ah, women! Wonderful creatures. I love them.
All of them.
Even the fat one with a hairy moustache that lives next door.
(actually I think she’s a lesbian)
So after having paid homage to the woman, and all women, we then moved on to the next topic: almighty God.
But being devout infidels and heathens, and devils sperms, and amoral, immoral, wicked, fork-tongued, horny-headed, blasphemous, evil, supercilious lumps of devil flesh – we weren’t going to pay homage to Him! The discussion on God generally focused on the fact that he don’t exist, which kinda killed the conversation because there’s little point talking about something that don’t exist. Much better to talk about something that is just as great and grand that DOES exist.
So we talked about…Me.
Ah yes, Me – my favourite topic. Not enough discussion on this topic if you ask me. We need more Me on the news, the papers, and on the television. And on giant advertising billboards too if possible. Anyway, all the guys agreed that I was an interesting, intriguing and fascinating person albeit a little aloof and big-headed. I was also, according to the Shoot the Fatman Club members, a unique specimen of humanity – but then I realised that they were simply being factual. We are ALL unique DNA specimens of humanity. I did try and get them to admit that I was also funny – but they just laughed…
….to be continued…